Monday, May 31, 2010

I don't care that it's 47 degrees C and I have to hold an umbrella. I'm getting married today. So fuck you!

Who the hell do you think you are?

Dearest Hawtt dudie,

If you ever see this video, please know that I was very late for work because your entire family's favourite pastime is gallivanting to bhojpuri music on a National Highway in the middle of the day, in the middle of summer.

Also, while I was waiting for your highness and HMS* Equestrian Ass to pull over, I could think of but three rational reasons why you must get married in sweltering Madhya Frigging Pradesh on a Wednesday afternoon in May -

You get to sport these really sexy glares/cooling glass/goaggles while there is a horse between your legs
You can have the audacity to look like a clown who's really really so desperate to get married despite all weather-beaten odds that you're prepared too hold an umbrella over your head while there is a bloody horse between your legs
You get to lead the most gaudy and retarded entourage that decides to block traffic on NH-12 for over an hour just because you have a bloody horse between your friggin legs

Please know that I am pissed. Very Pissed.

Your biggest fan

*HMS - Haggard Motherf*****g Steed


kamna said...

Hahahaha... im so sure u gave the hottie on the ghoda a piece of ur mind... im just so envious of ur luck with getting into such situations... its not fair... if ure in shitty place ure not entitled to such situations...

vira said...


now you have one more reason to despise people from MP na =))

notgogol said...

@kamu: Waah! Awesome place main tu reh. Aur awesome experiences bhi tere hi ho? WTF! Jaa tapas kha. Kutti.

@vira: I read that. Not funny :P

Anonymous said...

Funny! But correct me if Im wrong but isnt the umbrella part of the groom on horse ritual? Nothing to do with the weather.
Though the umbrella is usually red and shiny embellished with some hanging stuff.


AtomicGitten said...

To quote Alladin "It's the first time I'm seeing a horse with two asses".
Marriage itself is a bad idea top that off with becoming a public nuisance and you have the perfect recipe for homicide. So... did he fall off the horse?

notgogol said...

@M: I really have no clue :| I could ask my mom but then it might give her the wrong impression about my intentions to preserve my current marital status. Oh.. too risky! I shall take your word for it.

P.S. Did you know - "M" in James Bond is played by Jud(y)i Dench?

@atomic: Lol. But who the hell quotes "Alladin"?
I was in half a mind to throw him off it. But it's really hot in MP man. I wouldn't want to get tanned you know! :|

AtomicGitten said...

Any child of the Disney era will quote Alladin- of course you being geriatric and all wouldn't know ;D
And tanning? Tried Fair and Handsome? :P

HolyTrance said...

hahahaha..loved the pics n description!

notgogol said...

@atomic: biatch!

@holytrance: thanking you. yours sincerely.