1. Here, disguised unemployment seems to be the local solution to global recession. It is perhaps the only Indian city where a single crossroad is manned by 13 traffic policemen in spite of the presence of traffic signals in perfect working condition. The absolute lack of synchrony in their traffic-channelizing dance (that would put most undiscovered South American tribes to shame) hints at their relative dispensability. Retarded chimps would do just as well.
2. The only people frisked in a bakehouse called Karachi Bakery are Muslims; the rest of the world struts in with ease. I am going to leave the multiple levels of hypocrisy and irony in the above observation unstated. Perhaps the city needs to discern Going Global from Aping Global.
3. What does a woman clad in a Burqa do in a club called Bottles & Chimneys? Double er.. Multiple standards? Please do e-mail me if you solve the conundrum.
4. The best biryani in town is dished out at a joint called Paradise. The only semblance to logic, albeit misplaced, in this confused city.
5. You will doubt the authenticity of your native tam/punju/bong/ghati/mallu/bihari/parsi accent when you hear the Hindi dialect of hyderabadi urdu. Tum logaan ku sharam aayinga. Hyderabad main itte itte tez potta hai rey. Inu logaan, ghar pe baithke gotiyaan nakko khelte re miyan. Road ke bich main, tiraafic rok ke, haathan aur pairaan ke saath paagalan ke jaise-ich khaleja piit-te rey bava. Phir hullu hullu karke, aap-ich pata nahin kaiku, tamasha band kartei. Jabardast majaa martei inu logaan. Ekdum jabardast!